My two weeks worth of workshops are now over and during that time I have been observing Khmer kids both inside the classroom and out. Weirdly, at the same time, I have been watching episodes of a US TV drama which I downloaded before coming over: Friday Night Lights. This show has been around for five seasons, but I’m a bit slow on the uptake when it comes to American TV (except Mad Men…but that’s another story). For those of you who don’t know, the show is about a very small, lower class Texas town which exists purely for its HS football team. So, in the cultural dissonance department, this couldn’t be a weirder thing for me to be watching. But it has allowed me to focus a bit on some of the similarities and differences I’ve experienced between US and UK kids, and Cambodian kids. Note I say “experience” and not “learn.” The kids I have come to know in Siem Reap are from desperately poor backgrounds, but I have observed others on the streets, coming in and out of schools, etc. Even so, I would never presume that what I have seen is generally true. The other caveat is that Siem Reap is not the big city. Kids in Phnom Penh may be “faster”. But people often ask me what the difference is between kids of the West and this part of the East, so here’s what I’ve observed:
* Similarity: Facebook is king. All kids in Cambodia are on it, talk about it, to the extent that teachers have to ration it and set rules.
* Similarity: Pop music is a unifying force. Big pop stars in Cambodia are Eva, Cam, Niko (not to be confused with Neko)
* Similarity: There are cliques, best friends, kids that hang together and those that don’t
* Similarity: As far as I can tell, if a teenager is sitting down (not in class) or standing alone, he/she is staring at the screen of her/his phone
* Similarity: Obsessive interest in/desire for/knowledge of the latest technology
* Similarity: They pay close attention to their clothes and hair
* Similarity: In Khmer kids, there is not only an eagerness, but a hunger, to learn and an intense pride taken in what they know. Alas, I have rarely seen that on display in Western schools, even if it is privately felt.
* Difference: There aren’t obvious teenage “tribal” differences i.e. Goths vs Emo’s vs Jocks (forgive me if my Western teen tribe info is out of date. The names may change but the idea is the same)
* Difference: Khmer boys (even teens) are more affectionate with each other, putting their arms around each other’s shoulders, tousling hair affectionately
* Difference: Khmer teens seem to grow up slower. No real romances until late teens, at the earliest
* Difference: Khmer kids, like the entire culture, is more conservative in the way they dress and in their manner. Blatant sexuality is not omnipresent, and so in that way, they seem to grow up more slowly.
* Difference: Because of the above, you never see teenage boys and girls (or adults either) engaged in PDA (i.e. public displays of affection). And in school…inconceivable.
* Difference: A group of kids together will always mean lots of loud laughter, no matter where they are. There is less obvious sullen silence and/or anger, emphasis on the word obvious.
* Difference: Most Khmer kids also love, listen to and sing along with traditional music
* Difference: The divide between teens and adults seems narrower, in that there is less simmering mistrust, fear or disrespect. But this may be because I am a barang (foreigner) and a “cha” (short for “teacha”). But when I have taught in Western schools, I rarely get the immediate smiles and “Hello, Sue” that I get from every Khmer kid I work with. I’ve seen the same interaction with the Khmer teachers. There is much warmth shown, even though Khmer teachers tend to be quite strict and more likely to draw a line of separation between student and teacher.
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| A still from Friday Night Lights |
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| Khmer kids biking to school |
PS When I put “Khmer teenagers” into google looking for an appropriate image (which was hard to find since I didn’t want identifiable individuals etc), I also found this one in the list:
Oh my — I’ve gone native….
That is a wonderful post Sue! I recognise exactly what you are talking about from the kids I worked with in Thailand.
C x
This is really interesting and draws me to conclude that my kids’ international school is a mixture of your two lists! No surprise, I suppose.
And I’m sure you know, but you’d be a ‘farang’ here in Thailand.
It’s funny, but the characteristics you describe about Cambodian teenagers sound just like my teenage sons and their friends.
All of them are on Facebook and really it has to be rationed. They love it because it’s their way of communicating and has replaced land lines. When not on Facebook they are on their phones because they have the internet on their phones and are in touch with friends all the time.
In our area of London at least the comment about relationships is also true. My older son is 16 and although they’re in a ‘cool school’ and he has cool friends, none of them are in relationships yet. They go around in groups of boys and girls but mainly to activities like music, sports, cycling, cinema. I think the relationships will start now – so late teens is about right.
The relationship between kids and adults has become much more one of friendship. I haven’t experienced any of that teenage angst from them and their friends although I was expecting it.
I have a feeling the fact that London is so multicultural means there are more similarities. The fact that relationships start later has affected all children and they all seem to have that bit longer as children. It has been lovely to see my sons enjoying this. It’s a definite cultural change for the better.
I suppose technology has also led to similar behaviour across cultures and across the world.
In school I do find the teenagers I know are really enthusiastic about learning and they’re always telling me things I don’t know if I show a gap in my knowledge. Much of it has been Googled and learnt out of their own desire for knowledge. And these kids are mainly from some of the poorest council estates in North London, plus it’s a standard London comprehensive.
They do have to call their teachers ‘sir’ and ‘miss’ so they are expected to show more respect here. They’re very close and friendly with some teachers though, especially the music and media ones.
Interesting to hear the similarities and differences, and to find the differences weren’t so different in my area of London (probably due to successful multiculturalism here).