A million years ago, back when my husband and I were young and “in transition,” there was a little expression we would occasionally turn to each other and say with half smiles and raised eyebrows: “flux sucks.” Well, this is certainly a good week to bring the old adage out of mothballs. After all the family celebrations of last week, these next few days are all about closing down one part of my life, opening up the next, shifting schedules and seasons, preparing for what lies ahead without giving up what has gotten me this far. A bit dramatic that. But it feels that way, not only because I’m preparing Number 2 Son for his life on the other side of the ocean, and because I’m soon heading off for a prolonged summer stay in the States, but also because my writing life is a bit on hold.
The first full draft of the new novel is complete and in the trusted hands of some friendly readers. I already know of some changes I want to make to the last chapter — thanks to my marvellous writing group — and I anticipate more suggestions coming soon. When I’ll actually get to make any of these changes is any one’s guess. No time soon, I fear. But in the past, when the writing of one novel was drawing to a close, I already had a pretty good idea what the next novel would be. But here I sit, nearly ready to close one book and open another, and the ideas just aren’t there. Actually, the theme is there. A possible character or two. But no plot. No place. No springboard. Although it’s not worrying (I do trust that in time the idea will come), it is annoying. I feel like I’m in limbo in so many parts of my life, and my impatience is showing, ie flux really does suck.
If I was reading this about a friend, I’m pretty sure I would know what advice I’d give. Let it go. Stop thinking about it. Get on with the necessities of life but just keep your eyes open and keep reading. Well, I’m tryin’. I’m tryin’. But if any of you wonderful people out there have any other ideas or thoughts for me at this time of limbo, I’d love to hear them.
In the meantime, maybe this will help.
Oh there is nothing worse than that limbo feeling!! (I have felt like that for ages whilst waiting to hear back about my Uni applications). There are some big changes coming up in your life (Change is always unsettling)…I’m sure once you feel on a more even keel the ideas will come flooding (You’ve already got a theme and that’s half the battle!!)
Keep your chin up
C x
In one sense the one you’ve finished isn’t complete. You say so yourself. And its probably not finished until you hold the hard copy in your hand. A break in the states is going to be good for starting new ideas and thinking about them without committing yourself seriously to paper.
(Oh my g-d I’m sounding pompous, sorry.)
I can’t read without thinking about what I’m learning for my own writing experience. I’m sure you feel the same.
There told you how to suck eggs rather than suck flux or flux sucks.
g
Carol: I’m sure you’re right, but it’s nice to have some friendly encouragement!
Glyn:You’re so right about the book. It really isn’t finished, is it? And don’t worry — you don’t sound pompous at all!
I’m a terrible wait-er. Waiting for comments would drive me crazy, it would put me in stop mode. I think the limbo feeling will go when you find out what people think and you see how life is with your son away. For now, as others have said, it is best just to let life go forward with you, flow with the current. It’s a lovely thing on a hot summer day.
Limbo is hard – but the change all sounds positive and life-enhancing. Good luck with it all.
Limbo? You can limbo??? I’m s-o-o jealous …
Seriously though, you know the ideas will come when they’re ready. Meanwhile, just keep living and loving and have a good summer. x
Lauri, Helen: Maybe it’s good old fashioned separation anxiety…I realize I struggle with this every summer. Thanks for the pep talk.
Debi: Didn’t I tell you I’ve been taking limbo lessons? 🙂 You have a wonderful summer, too!
Sue, I do understand about the limbo feeling, I’ve felt like I’ve been there for the last two years… only this past week in Anam Cara did the Next Big Project come into focus. I strongly advise writing flash fiction!! That got me through two years… and it can be pretty lucrative 🙂
In limbo times, I often find that working on short pieces (e.g. self-contained poems) rather than Big Projects (e.g. whole sequences or an entire collection) can be quite helpful – makes me feel I’m getting something done which, in turn, makes it easier to tolerate the restlessness!
Good luck, Sue – when do you leave for the States?
Tania and Susan: You both have the same undoubtedly good advice of keeping up the writing with shorter pieces. Absolutely! Will do! Thanks…
Great post. Chin up, that limbo-land can swallow you.