Yesterday was the first day in over twenty years when, all things being equal, I didn’t have to wake up at some ungodly hour to send some kid off to school. I slept in until 8.30 (jet-lag assisted). The house was quiet — the husband was already at work. Over coffee and emails, I looked around and thought to myself, “this might not be so bad after all.” I always felt that every September brought some new permutation of my life, different work maybe, perhaps a different schedule, certainly different worries. But the one constant was that the daily, operational needs of my kids always came first, and now they don’t. Both of them are living their own lives, not looking to me for food or carpools or clean clothes. And you know, it’s pretty sweet. Although when I pass Number 2 Son’s empty bedroom I still feel that dull ache in the middle of my chest, I’m already beginning to realize that putting myself first on a more regular basis is going to be just fine.

So here are some random thoughts about my new “Not Back to School” life.
* Travel. I love to travel. I find it incredibly important both to me personally, and to my work. I’m no longer bound to school holidays (imagine skiing with empty lift lines!) and I no longer have to worry about babysitting. And as it happens, although I just got back from the summer hols yesterday, I’m off to Berlin tomorrow for a weekend conference my Husband is attending. I’ve always wanted to go to Berlin and this is a great chance to do it (and, who knows…I might even run into George Szirtes who is there as well, according to his blog.)
* Book Launches. I love going to book launches and I love supporting writers both in their struggles and their triumphs. Over the past couple of years I’ve gotten to know more and more writers, and that’s meant more and more book launch invitations, many of which I’ve had to decline. I never wanted to be out too many evenings in a week. But now, especially given my husband’s intense work schedule, I can go to many more of these.
* Theatre. My work with CurvingRoad has also introduced me to many new playwrights, actors and directors. Here in London, the amount of theatre available on any given night is endless, and many of them now feature the work of people I know. My newly free evenings will certainly land me in many more theatre seats.
* Music. For years I have played in the violin section of The Kensington Philharmonic. We rehearse every Monday night, and although I’ve made sure I’ve attended most of those rehearsals, it always meant rushing out of the house just when some son or other was coming home. I’ve always felt uncomfortable about that. But now… (and here’s a shameless plug: our next concert is in Chelsea Town Hall on Sunday evening, 22 November — an all Dvorak concert, including the wonderful cello concerto).
I suppose the common theme here is time (not that I’ve ever obsessed about that subject before, as all you “Tangled Roots” readers understand). I now have more time for me, and you know, that’s not so bad after all.
But what about work, I hear you ask? Well, that’s going to be interesting as well this year. I have a new manuscript burning a metaphorical hole in my computer, and next week I start sending it around to agents. For various complicated reasons, it’s time for me to find a new one. A fearsome task, to be sure, but I’ve decided to be as positive and optimistic as humanly possible. I’ll keep you posted. And while that novel is finding a home there’ll be time to finish up the poetry collection I’ve been working on for a few years. And in early 2010, I hope to see a production of my first full-length play (more on that later, as well). And then there’s always a new play to write and, indeed, a new novel. That should keep me busy. And to ward off evil spirits, here is a hilarious short video that I’m nabbing from Jamieson Wolf’s blog (with his permission) showing one man’s way of dealing with horrible reviews.