As I look towards this weekend, I see that it is all about making that leap to the new adventures that always seem unique to summer. On Sunday, #2-Son heads off for a 6-week tour that will take him along the old Silk Road into the depths of westernmost China. He’s off getting his last jab right now, and tomorrow I teach him how to pack all his worldly possessions into the type of old-fashioned backpack I remember using during my time bumming around Israel and Europe. I wasn’t much older than he is now when I did that, and my own trip still feels — well, not like yesterday, but not like decades ago either. Amazing.
And #1-Son is just starting rehearsals for a terrific new play he will be acting in this summer up at the Edinburgh Festival. He’s been at the Festival with a play once before, but this time it’s a big deal venue and a prime time slot. As a young, up-and-coming actor this is a great experience, putting him in front of a much larger audience than ever.
Poor husband’s adventures are more crammed in amidst the daily grind of dispensing his wisdom in offices worldwide, but still, he’ll get his holidays on golfcourses and eventually on the beach back in the States.
Ah, the beach. That’s where I’m headed. This is normally a schizophrenic time of year for me. I’m lucky enough to have an island home that I go to each summer, where I can work, rest, see family, cook too many dinners, entertain too many guests, spend too many hours in the sun, and generally just have some hot fun in the summertime. But the transition is always difficult. I’m always reluctant to leave the city, worried about all the work I have to do, and afraid of all the events and people I’ll miss. And then when it’s time to come home, I have to forcibly pry my clinging hands from the door post crying “why oh why must I go back to that god-forsaken vortex of too many people and too much commerce and too much…everything?”
And this year is even worse, because this year I also have to toss away my “retailer’s fedora” and dig up my dusty “artist’s beret.” This year I’ve done far more selling than writing, and the great adventure — and the great challenge — of this summer is trying to get back to doing what I supposedly am all about in the first place…creating. Time to stop selling and start producing; to stop explaining about Moscow and start wondering about Phnom Penh; to stop looking outside of myself and start excavating those places inside that most people happily let lie unnoticed. And, to be honest, I’m frightened.
Just because I’ve written one novel doesn’t mean I can write another one, does it? Just because I once discovered those hidden images and unexpressed emotions doesn’t mean I can find them again. Maybe all that creativity got tired of waiting and upped sticks to find some other, more attentive mortal. Now, if any other writer said this sort of crap to me I know exactly what I would say. I’d say (and have said) don’t be silly, you are who you are, whatever talent/craft/wisdom was there before is there now. Just get on with it. But, as you know, your own crap is harder to let go of (so to speak) and I am now plagued by a bad case of the “what if’s.”
JJ has wisely talked in her blog about writing 100 words a day. I suppose it’s like taking baby steps — you just put one foot in front of the other and eventually you’ve walked a mile. I need to keep that in mind. And listen to this — just as I wrote that last sentence, a clap of thunder reverberated through an otherwise cloudless sky, coming out of nowhere. Really! It’s true! It’s the weird sort of meteorological electricity you get on the island all the time in the summer, but which I rarely see here in London. A wayward flash arising from who-knows-where. Okay, it’s not a particularly original metaphor, but a metaphor it is nonetheless, and maybe
it’s a sign that the writer in me is closer to the surface than I had feared.
So my family and I will all be a bit busy with packing and travelling over the next few days, and then I’ll be heading off to the island for the rest of the summer. I’ll still keep blogging, but it might be a bit more sporadic for a while. Please keep checking in, though, and I’ll check in with all of you. Come to think of it, this year, in all of you, I have a bit of my “real life” that I can bring along with me to the other side of the planet. It’s a real comfort and I’m grateful for it. I won’t be gone long.
And in the meantime, what’s the summer without some good ole’ music. Take it away, Sly…..
Just because I’ve written one novel doesn’t mean I can write another one, does it? Well, Sue, I don’t see why not. I think it means exactly that, that you can do it and you know you can because you’ve done it already.
The 100 words really have worked very well for me. I have no doubt you’ll figure out what will work. Have a lovely summer and keep us updated as to how you’re getting on.
JJx
Hope you have a lovely summer.
And, it should be that just beacuse you’ve written another novel YOU CAN write another. Simple 🙂
Don’t put up boundaries. Relax and try not to lose sight of the pleasure.
xxx
I’ve just helped my son pack for 5 weeks in Cambodia/Thailand. I know he’s going to have a wonderful time but he seems so young to be going.
I’m sure you’ll be fine writing book #2. I do the 100 words a day like JJ and find it really helps me get going each day.
Enjoy your island.
Dx
Course you can write another Sue! I’m reading Tangled Roots now and absolutely loving it!
Also love your top tip in post below.
One day (I hope) I’ll need to refer to them. if not, I know plenty of other people who will benefit!
Have a lovely summer. I’m not jealous in the slightest of your island summer ways:-)
I’m also a devotee of the Hundred Word a Day blog. It really is baby steps but it seems to be working.
I don’t have time to write every day (work and life gets in the way) but I do aim for 1000 words a week. You can write another book Sue, the words do come. I am looking forward to reading your next book. Have a wonderful summer, how I miss being ‘back home’, your post just brought all those images of a West Coast summer back to me.
100 words a day? You do far more in each blog I think, you should be fine.
But in sunshine? On an island?
Me, I need rain, cold breezes and miserable acoustic guitars before I can settle down to write.
In sunny weather I tend to fall into beer gardens…
Still, enjoy and good luck.
Enjoy the Summer and enjoy the writing. And thanks for the song…ace!
You can do it Sue….I know you can!! I get the doubts every time I go to start a new piece of art but once I’ve started…well….I kinda wonder what I was worrying about and I’m sure it will be the same with you!!
Have fun on the Island and don’t work too hard 🙂
C x